For sale: One Mammy, hardly used.

It's a really old cliché; Kids grow up so fast.

Most of us accept it as patently true. Sure, they grow half a foot every time you turn your back, you can hardly pretend it's not happening. I think most parents though, are allowed to actually *help* their kids to grow up. Not us though. I'm starting to suspect that our kids only keep us around in order to reach the sweets in the high presses.

Heading off into their future together

Last March, one Saturday morning while Hubby wasn't even in the country, Little Man decided to potty train himself. He did a great job. Heaped praise on his own successes, insisted on cleaning up his own messes, and decided it was time for nappy-free nights just a couple of months later.

The dodie tree

Last weekend, this same Little Man decided he was now too big (cue gesture from toes to head to show exactly *how* big) to have a dodie. In fact, he wanted to give his dodie to the baby birdies. In Nanny and Grandad's garden. Tomorrow, after lunch.

Having been informed of these plans, Hubby and I happily went along with it. The dodies, tied to coloured ribbons were strung from the trees, and Little Man sang a song to encourage the birdies to come along and take them. Another success!

This weekend, Little Lady - who is not yet 26 months - decided to potty train herself. She didn't even feel the need to tell us. Oh no, it was the presence of an idle nappy on the sitting room floor that alerted us to the fact that she was now wearing a pair of her brother's pants, pilfered from a radiator!
After a few false starts on Saturday, she seems to have the hang of it, and has been despatched to creche with enough spares to last the day. I hope.

Once again, Mammy has had little input here. Still, at least I can feel confident that when it comes to parenting their own kids, they'll already have first-hand experience, having raised *themselves* so well.

Actually, I've just realised that I can only reach the lower shelf of the high presses. Even I need Hubby to help with anything higher!

Oh dear. If you need me, you'll find me on a street corner, bearing a cardboard sign. "Will parent for food"

Goodbye, Crappy Tuesday

Yesterday was quite the humdinger of a day.

In the course of 12 hours or so, I

1) Sent my glasses and wallet to creche in Little Lady's bag
2) Drove my car into a wall on arriving at work (Ref: point 1 - no glasses)
3) Realised I'd left my laptop at home
4) Dropped my keys in a puddle outside the house while retrieving laptop
5) Got locked out of the work carpark on returning with laptop
6) Endured a headache caused by stripping out crappy code while not wearing glasses
7) Walked into a wall (admittedly, not an uncommon occurence)
8) Slipped on the kitchen floor, spilling milk EVERYWHERE
9) Twice
10) Allowed myself a healthy swear on the second spillage
11) Got told off by Little Man, as "There's no need for shouting Mammy"

I would contend that this day was clearly unfit for purpose, and I fully intend to demand a refund.

Perhaps, if you've had a similarly crappy day - at any time - we can band together and initiate a class action lawsuit against the provider of these substandard days?
Does anyone know how to get in touch with Alan Shore and Denny Crane?

Answers on a postcard please!

To bed, perchance to sleep!

Some people may wonder why I'm tired these days. Why I don't spend my evenings in cool coffee places with friends, or even sitting on the couch chatting on the phone.

Mostly, these are people who don't have a daughter who has just turned two.

To be honest, I've been a bit baffled myself. She's tired, I put her to bed. Simple, right? So why am I still in her room an hour later?

Well it turns out that 2 year olds are very busy people. My Little Lady even has a checklist that she *must* complete before sleeping. It's quite complex actually. Really, I should be the one feeling sorry for her.

I happen to have gotten my hands on a copy of her checklist and I decided to share it here.

1) Give Daddy and big brother a Night Night Giss
2) Go to bedroom
3) Run back down hall to give Daddy another Night Night Giss
4) Close bedroom door BY MYSELF
5) Sing ABC song. Twice
6) Round of applause for a song well sung
7) Ask Mammy if Daddy is assileeeeep?
8) Ask Mammy if Ebbybody is assileeeeep?
9) Give Mammy a Giss
10) Tell Mammy that Baby Fuffie (Sophie) was crying in school today, because she was sad
11) Tell Mammy that Baby Fuffie is NOT crying emmymore. She is all better
12) Take dodie OFF blankie NOW
13) Sing Mr Golden Sun
14) Sing Bob the Builder
15) Tell Mammy to SHUSH, because Ebbybody is assileeeeep!
16) Ask Mammy to put blanket on my back
17) No, my OTHER back!
18) Put dodie ON blankie NOW
19) Sing Jedward song
20) Tell Mammy I'm singing Jedward song
21) Tell Mammy that Daddy is lawffee (lovely)
22) Tell Mammy that Daddy is assileeeeep
23) Give Mammy another Giss
24) Go to sileeeeep